Pink Garden

Sunday, April 12, 2009

was looking forward to a long weekend... coz fri was gd fri... but need to go temple to pray... time reali passed... grandma had left us for 49 days... and today will be the 51st day... sob... we bought lot of things for her... bags, jewelleries, money of coz... and bungalow... with swimming pool... but she realli receive it? can the hse be stayed? really not very sure... but then juz believe tat things will be as per what we tot it will be... hope she's well...

had a fight with dear... coz i made him wait again... i cant help but tink of kelvin... that was the same familiar face that i used to see when he came to pick sis up... so is history going to repeat itself on me??? im having much phobia... and mine~ didnt expect things will turn out this way... disappointed was the word.. i always hope tat my bf is a understanding bf... understand me, understand my work... but then it turned out tat it was not... i was accused of making him stand and wait in the rain... and i cant leave office on time when eveyone had gone home becoz i had to get a quotation for my boss... he only came to me at 6pm... and i was abt to leave... so shd i tell him "sorry i need to go?"

so i stayed behind and sms dear, n i said sorry... but no much use... i didnt noe it was raining... n i didnt noe he wont seek shelter... as much as he was angry, i was angry too... and very sad abt it... anyway no matter how i explained, he wont listen... so i got on the bike... and off we go...

started pouring while we were on the way home... n he said "let u get the feel of being caught in the rain" and then another one "so the rain nice?" some other comments he made but didnt wanna listen... i dun wanna hear all those nasty comments from him... i didnt expect to hear all these from him... if being caught in the rain will ease his anger, i dun mind standing in the rain for 1 hr... if he really love to see me drenched in the rain, i'll do it... moreover im the one who made him wait for me in the rain... an eye for an eye... he stand for how long, i'll stand for how long... im juz disappointed that he actualli got so agitated over this incident... n he made it like i purposely came down late, and i asked the sky to rain... and i purposely made him wait for me in the rain... so am i happier seeing him getting drenched??? if i am... then fine with it...

i cried... very bitterly... for very long... i usually cry so bitterly when i was being wrongly accused... if im in the wrong, i'll apologise... but if im being wrongly accused, i will tink its my fault too... coz i failed to make him understand me... n i failed to make him trust me... in his heart, i am that kind of person... i really feel very sad...

i cant help but to have many doubts... many his love for me fades... maybe his tolerance towards me fades... i asked someone a few day ago, what made her wanna marry her husband??? does she have any phobia abt marriage... seeg many ppl with failed marriage... and sis's incident is a constant reminder to me... am i thinking too far? or tinking too much???

- Feed her Sugar....# ;

Sunday, April 05, 2009

juz came back from chalet over the weekend... fri-sun... tiring... need to work tml again... monday blues~

tiring chalet coz i din get to slp a lot... or rather i slp n slp but still insufficient slp...

on leave on fri... shiok... went to grandma hse to pray... its grandma bday... if she's still with us we'll be cel her 87th bday for her... miss her a lot...

took bus 28 home and has a strange incident... one uncle juz fainted in the bus... i tink maybe stroke... and someone helped him up. his eyes were open but he seemed to be "frozen"... very stiff, blur and lost... everyone on the bus were at loss too... he suddenly fell down from his seat (he's sitting on the outer seat) onto the walk way in the bus... i was half dozzing off and listening to my mp3... then suddenly. i heard a loud "oooooooooohhhhhh"... the bus driver came down to take a look... everyone were very KPO aso... all look n look... so i aso look lor... the bus driver asked someone to cl the ambulance... then after a while, the uncle woke up... stood up and walked ard... i tink he wanna get down the bus but the bus driver refused... what if something happened to him? so he walked to the back of the bus and sat down... the bus driver followed him to the back and ask if he's ok... he didnt reply but stood up and walk back to the front (his original seat) and sat down again... the driver asked if shd still call the ambulance... we tink he shd la... juz i case sth happened to him again... so we got down the bus... the bus driver will wait for the ambulance to come... and i have to wait for the next one... whole trip from grandma hse to my hm took me 2 hrs.. cant believe it...

reached home, prepare for bbq food... i fried bee hoon... n dear is damn proud of me... coz my bee hoon is yummy... looks gd too... n my almond jelly is nice aso... not much almond smell... so dear aso eat some... overall rating, i gave myself 7/10 for bee hoon and jelly.. hee...

many ppl at the chalet... a fun celebration...all their sec sch frenz... i told dear this mth is a happy mth... coz many ppl's bday... Lai chai, thomas, keng teck... and kok thai's wedding... meet up this noon to tok abt kok thai's big day... cool!!! looking forward to tat day...

- Feed her Sugar....# ;